I really just need to get over it.

I can run, really, I can.  Obviously I am not where I want to be, but I can still run - probably longer than many people who weigh much less than me.  So why is it that I am so self conscious when I go running? 

I am somewhat embarrassed to admit that I try to avoid running in front of people, which is difficult to do outdoors.  For example, if my regimen requires I start running in 2 seconds, but a car full of guys is coming towards me, then I will wait until the car passes to start running even if it means I miss my start time.  If there is a group of people walking down the sidewalk I will change my route to avoid them.  I avoid people's gaze if I HAVE to run past them...oh, and I wear super dark sunglasses so I don't have to look at those people.

What am I afraid of? I am afraid of what they will think or say.  I imagine it would be somewhere along the lines of "what is that fat chick doing running?  She looks ridiculous."  Or maybe laughter.  Maybe worse.  Of course, this has never happened and I am sure most couldn't care less what I am doing. 

So even though I know in my head nobody cares, I can't seem to stop thinking about it.  Maybe it was the comments/remarks made to me regarding my weight over the years - those remarks go all the way back to high school and yes, I do remember them and they do impact my life.  Maybe it is because I always hung out with people who were much more athletic and much thinner than me and I was always embarrassed by how quickly I was out of breath compared to them.  Who really knows. 

What I do know is that I just need to get over it.  Not running simply because I am embarrassed is ridiculous and will obviously not make me any thinner.  Besides, any person who would make fun of a fat person for running is dumb as hell because the only way I will not be fat anymore is to get moving. 

So, I guess the point of all of this McFatty Monday Monday rambling? I need a mantra or saying.  Something I can repeat to myself over and over when the embarrassment complex creeps up.  I lost any sort of creativity I was born with during law school, so I need a bit of help.  Any suggestions?  

Thank you :)

Sunday Funnies: I hate Farmville

Even though I hate it, there are obviously way too many people who are very, very obsessed with Farmville. 

So close, yet so far...

This is a difficult place to be.  I have exactly 8 days until I am running a 5K in St. Paul.  My running has had many ups and downs throughout my Couch to 5K training and unfortunately right now, I seem to be having a down.

I am unsure where my motivation went, especially so close to the race, but it went somewhere.  I find myself giving up really easily and allowing myself to walk when I really could run.  I think the worst was yesterday when I tried to go out with Nikolai.  My regimen required I do a 5 minute warm-up walk and then jog for 25 minutes without stopping.  I decided to take a different route to mix things up and while I did run for the first 8 minutes, I found it difficult to run thereafter. 

I could blame several things, I guess.  First being that my unfamiliar route contained more hills and obstacles than my past routes.  The other being that it has been a while since I went out with Nikolai and pushing the stroller seemed incredibly difficult.  In the end, however, the only "thing" to blame for my bad performance is myself. 

I told Anwar that I have discovered at this point of the game that much of my endurance is simply mind over matter.  Yes I am tired.  Yes my body is screaming to stop.  But, yes, I can tell myself to keep going and I will.  There is nothing wrong with being tired or going further than you did the day before...it is just so damn hard.

I went out again today without the 30 pound resistance of Nikolai and stroller.   I did better and ran about 18 or so minutes out of the 25 and continued past the stopping point of my C25K timer so I could go the entire 3.2 miles.  This took me 39 minutes so I give myself like a "B-".  I am still pretty frustrated because I know I should be so much further than I am. 

I know I cannot let my frustration lead to apathy...so I just need to stay positive and know that I can finish the race...just finish.

A new trick!

So, yesterday I was taking pics of Nikolai because I thought his outfit was super cute.  So I got this pic:

And then this pic:

When suddenly he let go! So I got this pic:

I cheered "yay Nikolai!" and he just kept standing there.  So I said to myself "Holy crap, Anne, take another picture you big idiot!" So I got this pic:

Then he tried to take a step and fell down.  Way to go Nik! Walking in the near future? We shall see...

A baby's work is never done...

I guess that usually should be "a mother's work," but in this case the work all revolves around the baby, so it seemed fitting. 

I had forgotten how much work a baby is somewhere between Noelle's infancy and the birth of Nikolai (hey, seven years is a long time).  Babies are A LOT of work. There are always bottles in the sink no matter how many times I wash them.  There are always dirty clothes with food stains, formula odors or leaky diaper messes to be laundered (and we all know how I feel about laundry).  The trash is always full of diapers and everything else, and Mr. Nikolai, being the high-maintenance baby he is, needs almost constant attention. 

But, you know, Anwar and I usually handle all of the above just fine.  We both wash bottles, we both do laundry, we both pick up and we both pay attention to PITA.  Our responsibility-taking issues stem around sleep.  Yes, sleep. 

For the majority of his life Nikolai has gotten up at night at least every two hours.  It was physically and mentally exhausting, but Anwar and I had a good system.  I would go to be early and get some sleep and then I would take the night shift.  Anwar would always get up in the early morning to hang out with Nikolai and I would sleep again.  Naps were always taken too.  It worked. 

Now that we have Mr. Man *almost* sleeping through the night things are not working out as well - which seems odd, but it is true.  Making Anwar continue to get up with Nikolai every morning while I stay in bed hardly seems fair (the kid gets up between 4:30 and 5:00 people, WAY early).  So, we decided we would simply trade off and try to help each other out.  That worked for a while, but now we are getting upset about who gets up.  This is especially so for me if we had already decided the night before that Anwar would get up, but then when morning comes he wants me to get up instead.

I can't fault Anwar, we are both human and react poorly when lack of sleep is involved.  I have also told Anwar on many occasions I am very lucky that he is my husband because he is a good one.  I have many friends who I know do everything alone because their husbands "work" and they don't (BS).  Anwar is a good parent and shares in the work that comes with Nikolai well.   It is just this one thing.

So what do you do to workout the sleep issue?  We obviously have to change something, but what?  A predetermined schedule?  Every other day?  I'd appreciate your insight.

No jokes allowed!

The reason no jokes are allowed?  Because I cannot deliver a punchline to save my life.  I end up giggling and making the important part inaudible or I fail to emphasize the right word and end up explaining the joke (which makes even the funniest joke not funny).  To sum it all up, I am not a funny person.

I read many blogs where the content is packed full of witty and/or funny content.  Seriously, I look forward to reading them every day because I laugh out loud (I am mostly talking about Taming Insanity here - she is hilarious).  After reading such blogs I wonder, why in the world can I not be that funny?

It isn't that I don't have funny things to say, really, I do, it's just that my delivery of the material is less than stellar.  I mean, my brother (who is hilarious) can say one thing and have the room in tears from laughter.  Now, I could say the exact same thing and get a room full of blank stares.  Now that is just embarrassing. 

Want to know the worst part?  In my head I think I am about to drop a bomb of hilarity upon my family, friends, e-buddies (whoever really).  Then it is all sort of anticlimactic as I turn about 30 shades of red then laugh nervously hoping the blank stares is really just a delayed reaction of sorts.  Nope, I am still the only one laughing. 

I wonder if there are classes for this sort of thing...something akin to clown school or rehab.  Perhaps the same rehab that can help with my overuse of the exclamation point?  I suppose this is all sort of funny coming from a blogger who does a "Sunday Funny" every week.  I think if I had to write my own material for my weekly laugh fest that it would be quite the disaster. 

Anyway, next time I attempt to make a joke, maybe give me some delivery pointers so I can avoid the 30 shades of red...red isn't really my color anyhow.

My child is an animal!

Nikolai really likes books. In fact, you can quite often find him sitting on the ground flipping through a book and talking to himself.

Well, even though I thought that his "book reading" couldn't get any cuter, I started reading him a book with pictures of different animals. Like most mamas out there, I would make the animal noise along with the corresponding pic...here is the result:

Money, 5K's and fat, oh my!

So, let's begin with the whole weight watchers thing.  We had a major budget fail this week, which is putting it lightly.  It sounds so dumb to not have $40, but we really did not have $40 (especially after the $30 co-pay I shelled out for poor Noelle's finger).  So, unless this week goes better - which I unfortunately do not foresee - I will start counting calories like a mofo.  After we move I think our little money whoopsie will clear up and I will indeed be able to hang onto $40 a month.

The plan then is to keep you all up to date on my (horrible) eating habits.  This week I have actually done a really good job of simply being conscious of what I eat and therefore have eaten less crap.  I am nowhere near where I should be, but one step at a time, right?

As for my running, besides my attempt to run with the chest cold from hell, it went pretty well.  I repeated my a day and went 2.5 miles in 33 minutes!  Even after I finished I knew I could've kept going, which was really comforting, especially considering I am running a 5K in less than 2 weeks (yikes)! I think what has worked best for me, in terms of endurance, is finding an object to run towards and telling myself to just get to that object, then I find another object and repeat. 

On a side note, I sweat like crazy.  I don't think women are allowed to sweat this much!  Thank goodness the only person normally around to smell me is Nikolai, lol!

Sunday Funnies: Remember this gem?

So, this is a great example of why you should at the very least include someone who IS IN your target audience when creating new ad campaigns.  This ad was put out by McDonalds a few years back and the people who gave this the thumbs up obviously had no idea what they were doing...

LOL! That is just gross.

My Baby Rocks Review

Well, for those of you who have yet to hear, My Baby Rocks has the CUTEST punk baby clothes out there.  So when I was given the opportunity to do a review of the clothing I jumped at it.  What I received in the mail was this adorable tee with an old school boom box on it.  All I could this was "I Wanna Rock Right Now!" a la Rob Base and DJ EZ (yes, I am that old). 

Anyway, back to the tee...it is so cute, but more importantly well made.  This isn't some cheap see through t-shirt.  Nope, high quality, thick, 100% cotton.  I was very impressed because I have become accustomed to seeing the cheap stuff with kids' clothing. 

To model this cute item of clothing, here is my darling niece, Samantha!

She is too cute, right! And she looked adorable in her rockin' tee.  This is simply the tip of the ice burg guys, if you want to die of further cuteness, head to http://www.punkbabyclothes.net/ to see killer pieces like this:

and this:

Seriously, go now. 

No way, nope, no how.

I find it more than hilarious that the name Anne means grace.  I am quite the opposite.  I don't think there was a single year growing up that I was not in the ER due to some mishap caused by my clumsiness.  Let me give you some examples:

When I was four I was running through the house like a horse, misjudged a turn thereby hitting my head into the corner of a wall and splitting my head open.  Stitches. 

When I was about five or six I decided it would be a good idea to jump on a trampoline underneath the monkey bars...you can pretty well figure out how that ended . Stitches.

When I was maybe five I stuck a staple into an electrical outlet.  Yes, I was indeed electrocuted and still somehow managed to not only live, but I think I am still all there mentally (or am I).

Every year from third grade on I either jammed, sprained or dislocated a finger.  No, I am not kidding.

Now, Noelle has pretty well lucked out in the gene pool thus far.  She is amazingly beautiful (and it isn't just me people, I hear it all the time), she is so smart, smart enough to do very well in school and out, she is sweet and kind-hearted.  Now, that is all great...but the one thing she got from me that isn't...she inherited my grace, or lack thereof.

If you would like some examples...

When she was three she was spinning around at daycare and fell into the corner of a wall thereby splitting her head open (sound familiar).  Stitches.

When she was five she was at the last day of school and was riding her scooter.  She fell off and landed on her arm to stop the fall.  Yup, broken wrist.  Did I mention this happened the day before her birthday and we had to cancel her pool party because of it?  Yeah, we did.

Three weeks later Noelle was running around a shoe store and tripped over her own feet.  She landed on one of the foot measuring things and cut her leg open.  Stitches.

When Noelle was six she was playing on the merry-go-round with some friends and she swung it a bit hard and then tripped a bit and BAM her face went right into the metal bar.  Black eye.

Now yesterday, my poor girl decided to do some dare devil moves on the tire swing at school.  She isn't sure how, but she fell off and caught her pinkie finger on something thereby slicing it open.  No stitches, but the girl had to sit at the doctor's office getting splinters from the wood chips pulled out of the open wound. 

Ahhh, poor Noelle.  Sorry about the bad gene kid.  I guess the good thing about being accident prone is that we get to take fun pics like this!

Running while sick is not recommended

Seriously guys, just don't do it.  Against the advice of my friends and Anwar, I decided to go out for my C25K training on Tuesday.  You see, I have been feeling ill since last week...well, feeling ill is putting it lightly, I actually have the cold from hell.  I had already missed 3, yes 3, planned running days due to this horrible sickness and did not want to miss another.  I mean, what is the worst that could happen, right?

It was horrible.  After only four minutes my chest was on fire (yeah, the cough didn't just go away) and my head was pounding.  I just felt like a big waste of skin.  Needless to say I allowed myself to walk more than I should...I think had I pushed harder I would have felt worse.  The end result was a mind blowing migraine that left me bed ridden and totally useless.  For real, next time I will listen to my friends and just go for a walk.

I know I should not be so concerned, but I am less than three weeks away from the big 5K day and I feel like a set back like this so close to go time cannot be good.  Anwar keeps insisting that all I need to do is finish, but I feel like I will have failed myself if I cannot finish my training before the race.  I am supposed to run today...I am feeling somewhat better, but am super concerned regarding what will happen if I go, and also what will happen if I do not.

The best laid plans...right?

Anyway, cheer me on from afar, maybe I will kick this cold and get back in the saddle.

Safe Eyes Review

When I was 7 (almost 8) years old I used the computer to play the one game my dad had purchased - Oregon Trail - and to use the word program.  I don't even recall hearing the word "internet" and can guarantee we did not have it.  I don't even think I had an email account until I went to college.  Internet safety, therefore, was not an issue.

Fast forward 20 years and Noelle uses the computer at school every day, has her own email account and her own laptop (don't freak people, she got my old one when I got a new one).  I do what can to keep her from getting a not-so-appropriate page on the web via supervision and email forwarding, but come on, I am not going to stand over her shoulder 24/7.

I was oh so glad when I was asked to review Safe Eyes, a computer software program that filters inappropriate content from my daughter's internet activities.

First, Safe Eyes was super easy to install.   In fact, it is just like any program installation that uses wizard so you basically just hit "next" and all else is handled for you.  I did have to turn off my firewall and antivirus programs, which I wasn't thrilled about because it made me feel very vulnerable to computer viruses and the like.  I will say, however, that this is pretty standard in using programs like Safe Eyes.  I took the software for a test run by typing in things that obviously should be blocked, like a google image search for "boobs".  Yeah, that and many similar searches were completely blocked.   Score!  There was one instance where I typed in "nude" and a couple of scenes from Married with Children popped up (you know, the "nude"y bar).  That is the problem with google, and if you completely block google you lose a great reference resource and gmail...so I did not like that. 

I also discovered that Safe Eyes not only does a great job blocking most undesirable sites, but also times the user's internet time and website visits.  Noelle cannot stay on the computer all night, we limit her time and so Safe Eyes just helped us with that because instead of me wondering if Noelle had been on too long, I actually knew.  It was so handy! 

I think one of the best Safe Eye features was that I got a nice email at the end of the week detailing the total internet time and listing all visited sites.  I knew for sure that Noelle had stayed on her designated sites (she is restricted to school sites only during the week) because Safe Eyes told me so.  I also knew which sites had been blocked so I could see if there was a fluke page that should be unblocked or a page that Noelle was trying to access that she should not.  This is a cool feature that evey internet safety program should have.

Overall I think Safe Eyes is a great tool for keeping away the things that we don't want our kids to see.  Now, I cannot imagine Noelle searching for "boobs" on google anytime soon, but I feel safe knowing that it is highly unlikely she will accidentally stumble upon something she should not see. 

If you would like to learn more about Safe Eyes or if you would like to purchase the software, please visit them by clicking HERE.

We have made it to 9 months folks!

My sometimes sweet boy is 9 months old today.  He crawls faster than I can chase him, can stand on his own for a second or two, walks the parameter of our apartment by holding on to walls, furniture and anything else he can steady himself with, he laughs when you tickle his belly and has one little tooth.  As you all know, my little guy has his moments (thus the very fitting nickname, PITA), but we all love him very much and can't wait to see what else he has in store for us.

D-List Blog Party!

Well hello fellow d-listers!  I am slightly tardy to the party, however, thought I would introduce myself for those who don't yet know me. 

My name is Anne (for real, that is my name, no fake names here) and I currently SAH (by force, not choice) with my nearly 9 month old son, Nikolai and after school my nearly 8 year old, Noelle.   Nik and Noelle are so cute and get along so well.  I say I stay home by force because I am unemployed - strike up the violins and the sobs story - and have been for nearly a year.  I am a lawyer by trade and have the student loans to prove it.  My husband is a totally hotty and works in IT. 

A few things about me: I love to sing and pre-lawyer thing wanted to be an opera singer (I still sing in the shower, in the car and to my kids); I am obsessed with reality tv; I really love sushi and wish I could make it myself; and am forever attempting to lose weight and hope I finally found the right path for that; I HATE intentional grammar and spelling mistakes; and I am very tight with my siblings (they are my best friends).  I guess I should also add that I need rehab for overuse of the exclamation point.  For real.  

The blog?  What the heck is my blog about?  Well, it is about me trying to find a job, lose weight, be a good mom, deal with annoying people and overall just find the best way to be me.  I love comments and would much prefer them over hits...for real. 

If you want to know more about me then click here.  You can also click the links along the way and it will give you some insight to my writing style and what I do around here!  Can't wait to blog hop with you :)

If you want to blog hop too, go HERE!

There comes a time when you know things have to change.

I have been working out on a fairly regular basis since January.  I am been especially consistent since I started doing Couch to 5K.  As I said when I first began doing C25K, I hoped that a natural consequence of my regimen would be weight loss. 

Well folks, my sometimes working, sometimes not, crappy digital scale has gone down six numbers since I began my weight loss journey.  That's right, six pounds in nearly six months.  When you have over sixty pounds to lose, six is just a drop in the bucket and very disappointing.  Now, I cannot blame a lack of physical activity because I have been so diligent with my regimen.  The only thing left is food.

I've been dieting nearly my entire life.  I recall starting a diet at 16 because I had gained weight and did not feel comfortable anymore, especially around my super skinny friends.  From that point on I feel like I began a rollercoaster of weight loss and gain.  I lost and gained the same 20 pounds for a few years and was doing semi-okay until I started law school.  I lost total control of my eating habits and became very sedentary resulting in a 50 pound weight gain.  That is a lot and I feel horrible seeing pictures of myself and how big my clothes look on the hanger.

Currently, my eating habits are irregular and out of control.  Some days I will barely eat anything, others I will eat nearly an entire box of cereal in one day.  I pay no attention to my portions nor do I pay attention to how frequently I eat.  I most certainly eat when I am not hungry.  Obviously, I have to do something proactive to change this behavior.

So, today I will walk into Weight Watchers and start taking responsibility for what I have done, and what I continue to do, to myself.  Although I did not think WW was in the budget, I decided a few trips to Starbucks is not as important as my not getting diabetes and not as important as me looking and feeling good (both inside and out). 

I will keep you all posted about this portion of my journey...I am hoping it is the last piece of the puzzle for me. 

Wish me luck.

Sunday Funnies: Target conversations gone wrong

This following conversation took place while checking out at Target this morning...

Noelle: Mom, remember...remember!
Me: Um, remember what Noelle?
Noelle: Remember why I don't want to wear this dress tonight?
Me: No idea.
Noelle: To play with the puppy! Remember!
Me: (laughing) oh yeah, I forgot.
Cashier: That comes with age.
Noelle: Yeah, and she is not smarter than a second grader.

Haha!

Oh, Noelle.

Nik & Noelle...bff's!

I am taking a blogging sick day...for real, I don't feel good. So here are some pics.

Oddly enough, he was actually laughing, not screaming, in this pic :)

The problem with a vacation...

...is it isn't reality. 

I spent nearly 5 days caring for no one but myself.  Worrying about nothing but what type of junk food to eat next.  Thinking about nothing but how cute Nik would look in his new shirt (see the pic, he DOES look cute) or contemplate whether I'd gotten Noelle the right gift.  Money only crossed my mind when I needed to see how much cash I had left (thanks to my mom, of course).  I came home and reality had not yet struck, as I was greeted with roses, chocolate, a lottery ticket and a nice card for mother's day. 

No, no, it was not until the next morning that I awoke and remembered...oh crap, I am unemployed.  Oh crap, Nikolai is awake and the sun isn't up yet.  Oh crap, I am not sure if I have enough money in my account to get gas.  Throw in Nikolai screaming for two days because of a double ear infection and me catching the cold that brought on said ear infection, I considered draining our joint checking account (a.k.a. the rent money) and flying right back to California.

However, I had to remind myself, if I went to Cali right this second how would life change?  I would still be broke, unemployed, sick with a cold, and Nikolai would still be a PITA, a cute PITA, but a PITA nonetheless.  I guess the difference would be that I would have AWESOME weather...but would either be homeless or live with my grandma.  Although, living with grandma wouldn't be so bad, she makes awesome waffles.

Ultimately, my vacation was not reality.  I do not get to wake at whatever hour I chose - unemployed or not.  I do not get to eat crap all day every day and not pay the price.  I do not get to have people pay for my every expense (really, thanks mom).  While it was nice and I loved every second of it - well, every second excluding the plane ride and my busted bra - none of it was real life.  The only way I could go back to that fantasy is to win the lottery.

So, instead of being a downer and longing for the sunshine of California, I will continue living real life here.  Life with my kids & husband, life with my job hunting....and life with my continued effort to win the powerball ;)

The most difficult gift to purchase.

I don't think any of you could imagine that the most difficult person to buy a gift from Disneyland for was Noelle.  It was HARD.  Besides, her lack of confidence in my shopping skills did not help.

I scoured the shelves, went into multiple shops, picked up an item and then set it back down.  None of it would work.  Want to know why?  As sad as it sounds, my child gets made fun of at school if she wears anything that would be too "kid like".  Yes, that's right, my seven year old cannot wear a princess shirt, a tinkerbell outfit or anything with a boy on it because if she does she will hear it from her classmates. 

First of all, I am upset that my poor little girl cannot be a little girl at the tender age of 7 because of peer pressure and the unrealistic expectation for our kids to grow up too fast.  Second, I am upset that anyone would ever make fun of Noelle - who happens to be one of the sweetest kids alive.  Finally, I am upset that all of the stuff I picture my kid wearing she won't wear.  NOT COOL.

So put down that super cute tinkerbell hat, drop those t-shirts that carry the images of tiana and belle, in fact, leave the little girl section all together because you will just become depressed that 7 is the new 17. 

I did get permission to purchase something with Minnie or Mickey Mouse on it...so I bought her a pencil case and notebook with Minnie on them and nervously awaited her reaction to the gift.  She loved it (thank goodness) and proudly carried it off to school.

Next time I will just go right for the make-up and high heels...that should work for those elementary school punks, right?

I will take some Disneyland x2, please.

Now, after my horrendous flight I told you about yesterday (if you haven't yet read about it, click here) I was terrified that my whole trip would be a disaster.  You will all be relieved to know that after I disposed of my busted underwire, kicked off my flip flops and lounged in front of the TV all went right from that point forward. 

I was lucky enough to stay at the Grand Californian Hotel at the Disneyland Resort with my mom and sister (who had been there all week for the Disney Institute).  We excitedly went to the two parks at Disney (California Adventure and, of course, Disneyland) the morning after my arrival. 

For the first time in years I got to go on all of the big kid rides that Noelle is way too afraid to go on.  My favorite ride by far was Tower of Terror.  You know, the ride where they drop you 13 stories?  It was awesome!  We also went on super fast roller coasters and on rides meant for little kids.  So much fun.

I think one of the best things we did was standing in line to meet the mouse himself, Mickey Mouse that is.  I don't think I've ever had a picture with my sis and my mom next to Mickey - I am so excited to have it.  We also were able to just sit and chat (over some great food) because time management sans children is so much easier.

After our day of fun we spent the night in our hotel and then took the train down to San Diego to spend time with my grandma.  We'd been in the car for a whole 5 minutes when we all started talking about all the things we still wanted to do at Disneyland.  Because we are all nuts, we decided to hop back into the car Saturday morning and drive back to the Happiest Place on Earth (we have issues, I know).  It was so nice to be at Disneyland with my family!  Three generations all at one time :)  Now, my grandma did not venture onto the big kid rides, but she did hang with us and she is the reason we got those amazing beignets!

We totally hung out until the fireworks and then did our last minute shopping before hitting the road back to San Diego.  I honestly could have stayed at Disneyland for another week because I love being there so much. 

The next day I headed back to reality...and my kids, who I missed a bunch (oh yes, and Anwar too).  I am so glad my mom was able to send me on this vacation and cannot wait to bring the kids back to Cali.  For those of you considering Disneyland...stop considering and go.  Now enjoy some pics!

My sister and I in front of the "A"...it begins both of our names :)

In front of Cinderella's Castle!

Here we are again!!

My cute grandma next to a pic of SC Justice Sotomayor.

Lawyers fly first class, right?

Well, I can tell you the answer to that question is no, in my case at least.  Come one, come all and listen to the tale of my vacation to California.  There were ups and downs, adventure and delight.  Eating, eating and more eating!  I am sure this story is much too long to tell in one post (hell, I run screaming from posts I think are too long).  So we will start with my plane ride to the great state of CA and go from there!  Ready, set...go!

I was well prepared for my trip to Cali.  I had packed, every outfit for each day planned, cash, ID, boarding pass, downloaded Gossip Girl all set for my nearly four hour plane ride to Santa Ana (the airport closest to Disneyland). I got to the airport with just enough time to get to through security, get some coffee and then to my gate.  I got to the metal detector and kept setting the stupid thing off!! I was asked if I had any metal about 20 times before they decided to search me.  I knew, as well as any woman should know, it was my underwire bra.  I did not just get the wand, I got a FULL PAT DOWN because my boobs are too big to go without metal in the cup.  So instead of stopping for some Starbucks I went right to my gate.

I get on the plane and, of course, the thing is FULL of passengers and their carry-on baggage (I mean really, who wants to pay to check their stuff when they can carry it all onto the plane for free?) Since my slow patted down self was one of the last to board, I had to put my bag about 5 rows behind where I was actually sitting. Dislike.

Then, as always, I waited in anticipation of who I would sit by...will my seat be taken over by a person who doesn't fit in the absurdly small seat? Will I be seated by a drunk party goer? I was somewhat relieved to see a nice old couple head my way...that is, until they got within smelling distance. That nice old man, who ended up sitting RIGHT NEXT TO ME smelled so bad like B.O. I could barely stand it. I turned my head the other way so I could avoid the stench.


This horrible smell was followed by the 2ish year old kid SCREAMING his head off for over two hours (his poor parents were mortified).  Not even my headphones blocked out his screams. This was then topped off by the asshole who kept farting through the whole flight (B.O. and the smell of ass don't mix - at all).

When my plane finally landed I thought I was in the clear.  That is, until I realized something was poking me in the chest.  After further investigation, I realized that my underwire (you know, the same underwire that damned me to a pat down) had busted through and was now a good two inches out of my bra.  Yes folks, this was my one and only bra.  I got to the hotel hoping to salvage the underwire, but it could not be forced back in...so I ripped it out and threw...literally threw...it in the trash.  My next hope was that I wouldn't look really lopsided the whole trip. 
There is more to my vacation story, oh so much more, but you will have to visit me again for all of that stuff!    Did my boobs look lopsided?  Did I ever get the smell of fart/b.o. out of my nostrils?  You'll have to wait until tomorrow, my friends!

...to be continued...

I think this really is a Mc"fat"ty Monday

So, unless you've been living in a cave or ignoring my blog, twitter and facebook, you know I went on vacation.  Now the tales from that adventure will be told on another day....maybe over a few days.  BUT, today we will talk about how vacations make people fat.

From the second I strolled into our hotel at the Disneyland resort I was bombarded with food.  There were chocolates on the nightstand (which were replenished daily), the aroma of the food from the many eating establishments wafted through the hotel...it smelled great.

While at Disneyland I ate waffles, french toast, churros, ice cream, ice cream sandwiches, an enormous turkey sandwich, hot chocolate, mochas with whole milk & whipped cream, pizza, corn dogs....and more. 

And then, came the beignets.  I've never had beignets before...but plan to eat them for the rest of my life.  These doughnut like sweet treats came shaped like Mickey Mouse and with a vanilla bean and raspberry dipping sauce.  It was like a little piece of heaven right there on my plate.  I seriously wanted to lick the plate just to make sure every last morsel made it into my mouth.  I am seriously salivating just thinking about it now.  SO GOOD!  I would encourage you all to visit Disneyland, not only because it is the happiest place on earth, but also to get some of the best beignets EVER.

Well, needless to say I ate a whole bunch of crap.  So much crap that by Saturday night my stomach hurt.  Now, since I don't weigh myself I don't really know if I gained weight...but since I ate so much my stomach hurt I can safely assume I did not lose weight.  LOL.  I also kept to my running regimen by making use of the hotel gym.  For the record, I did not like running on a treadmill.  It was hot inside the gym which resulted in me sweating like I'd just run a marathon.  I was actually embarrassed to walk back to my hotel room because I was just drenched.  I also disliked the impact and the pre-set pace.  What if I want to run at a pace in between 5.0 and 5.1?  Huh?  Well, whatever.   I am just happy that my fatass at least kept up with that.

Ultimately, food is still my weakness...an extremely delicious weakness this last week.  Hopefully now that I am home I can return to just eating cereal 5 times a day like I usually do instead of shoving my face with lots of yummy crap. 

How did your week go?

Sunday Funnies: Noelle says the darnest things!

In honor of Mother's Day, I thought I would dedicate my Sunday Funny to the girl who made me a mom in the first place - Noelle.  So, in honor of Noelle, here are some of the things she has said that left me either speechless or rolling in laughter!

I must preface these musings by reminding you that my sweet child is only 7 years old...

• Anwar is notorious for trying to joke with Noelle.  After school one day, Noelle put a stop to that by saying the following: "It's been a long day Anwar, I'm not in the mood for silly." 

• After getting my permission for a playdate, Noelle wrote the following note to her friend at school:

Seriously.  What seven year old writes like that, lol!

• 
  
  We were trying to make cake one day and I thought we may be out of oil.  Noelle says to me: "If we're out of oil then we can't make cake and that would be a shame."

• 
  
  Upon discovering that I would be able to purchase her something from Disneyland, Noelle and I had the following conversation:
• 
  
  Me: "What do you want from Downtown Disney?"
• 
  
  Noelle: "What do they have?"
• 
  
  Me: "I'm not sure, a bunch of stuff.  They should have like toys, clothes, jewlery....what do you want?"
• 
  
  Noelle: "I don't know, maybe you can call me when you get there and tell me what they have and I can   tell you what to get."
• 
  
  Me: "How about I just pick out something for you and you can be surprised."
• 
  
  Noelle: "You'd better call me."

• 
  
  Noelle gave me a little book she had written that said several nice things about her friends and family.  I got to this page and just burst out laughing (read the green page and then the yellow page).

As you can see I am raising quite the little character.  She is a sweet girl and I am proud to be her mom.  Of course, I cannot leave Nikolai out too...but since he does not talk, I can only tell you that he is funny when he tries to give me a kiss by placing his open mouth on my cheek and blowing.  :)

Happy Mother's Day!

Anima Soap Winner!!

Today's lucky number is:

Which would make our lovely winner:

Hooray! As always, I will contact you and you have 48 hours to get back to me.  If you don't, then I will be forced to pick a new winner!  Yay for awesome soap :)

Baby Goes Pro Review

I decided to review the DVD "Baby Goes Pro" because it looked like a good way to show kids who are not otherwise routinely exposed to sports what an athlete does.  Nikolai also watched the short sample clip with interest. 

After nap and bottle I popped in the DVD for Nikolai to watch.  As a bonus Noelle was home and so she would be able to watch the DVD too!  I formulated my review after reading up on the website, watching the DVD, Nikolai's reaction to the DVD and talking to Noelle about her thoughts.

Baby Goes Pro features a animated character who goes through various sports (e.g. soccer, basketball, golf, etc) one at a time and shows the viewer movements that go into the particular sport.  For instance, for soccer the athlete demonstrated juggling the ball.  There is music that plays along in the background and there are also some feature songs.
Here is what I like about the DVD: the idea is great!  I can imagine there are many households out there where neither parent was ever engaged in a sporting activity and/or are just not athletic.  Allowing kids to see the different sports (in a kid friendly manner) is great.  The music was appropriate and the colors were good.

Here is what I did not like about the DVD:  I think my kids are not in the right age range to watch this DVD.  Nikolai (almost 9 months) was way more interested in other things in the room.  I tried to remove all other distractions and he watched the DVD for maybe a minute and then he crawled away to play with something else.  The music did catch his attention at some points, but the visual content of the DVD did not grab him. 

Noelle is three years older than the age recommendation and said she thought it got too repetitive- which I attribute wholly to her age (they did not make it for kids her age).  

Now, I did try one other time to show the DVD to Nikolai while his cousin (S, who is 15 months old) was over.   Nikolai once again did not watch more than 10 seconds.  However, S was interested and specifically liked the animated portions, the basketball spinning and the baseball section.  S did loose interest during some of the un-animated content, but I didn't expect her to watch the whole thing. 

Overall, I am 100% supportive of the idea behind the video and applaud the company for encouraging children to play.  I also think if I had children a little bit older or a little bit younger the outcome (and my review) would have been different.  This is evidenced by my slightly older niece liking the DVD.  Baby Goes Pro may be right for some families, just not mine.

If you would like to learn more about Baby Goes Pro please visit their website at http://www.babygoespro.com/


Don't forget!  Today is the last day to enter my Anima Soap Giveaway.  Click here to enter!!

You'll have to excuse my absence today...

I have a date with the mouse ;)

I will be back and give you some fun pics and stories from the Happiest Place on Earth!

As a reminder, you only have until 11:59 p.m. tomorrow to enter to win LOTS of amazing, organic and handmade soap through my Anima Soap Giveaway.  Enter Now!

So...did I run for 20 minutes? Did I?

Well, let me start off by saying I did not come home disappointed in myself as I feared in my Monday post.  I am actually very proud!  I did stop and allow myself to walk twice during my twenty minutes, once for two minutes and then again for about 40 seconds.  But the remainder was all jogging baby!  I am even more happy with how I did considering that I did such a great job WITH the jogging stroller (remember, the jogging stroller is resistance training in disguise).  There were many, many times that I wanted to just stop and walk...but I only gave in twice and then got right back to it.  I ran for a total of 17 min and 20 sec...I think that deserves:

I know, I am so cheesy!

Including the 10 minutes of warm up and cool down walking, I went just over two miles in 30 minutes...which I think is good!  I have about a month left until the big 5K and am happy to say I think I will get there. 

Oh yes, and Nikolai was a trooper!  There were so many bumps along the way because of the horrible sidewalks in Minneapolis, but he didn't even make a sound.  Overall it was great! 

Thanks to all those who gave me a little advice and encouragement for today - I really do appreciate it so much :)

Now I am off to hop on an airplane and head to sunny California!  Sorry if my post quality is low for the next few days...but I am on vacation! LOL!  Plus, I am super excited for Disneyland!

Don't forget to enter my Anima Soap Giveaway!  It is free soap people!

Anima Soap Review/Giveaway! UPDATED!

When first contacted about doing a review for Anima Soap I was a bit hesitant because of Nikolai's extremely sensitive skin and eczema.  However, after reading up on Anima Soap's website that they are dedicated to making chemical and synthetic free product and reading that their baby soap had very few - and organic - ingredients I decided to give it a shot.

I received, in a very speedy manner, a shipment from Anima Soap to begin my review.  At bath time I still somewhat nervously opened the box of baby soap.  First thing I did was smell it. That's right, I smelled the bar to ensure that it was absolutely fragrance free.  As promised, the bar was free of any artificial fragrances and so I grabbed a washcloth and went to work. 

The baby soap lathered very well, especially for a bar soap.  The lather also rinsed well, which is great because I hate when soaps stick to your skin.  Then, I waited.   I was somewhat worried that Nikolai would break out into a rash or his eczema would worsen.  But, even with his horribly sensitive skin, neither of those things happened.  No rash, no eczema break outs or irritation.  This is a great soap at a great price.  At $1.89 I will save a TON of money not using the store brand soaps for eczema which cost way more.

I also used the grapefruit bar meant for facial and body use (adults).  The soap smelled great and, much like the baby soap, had very few ingredients.  The lather was great and I felt squeaky clean after I got out of the shower.  I used the grapefruit bar to also wash my face and that worked great as well.  I would certainly recommend this product over even a body wash, as it lathered and cleaned in a similar manner. 

The only issue I took with the product is that once open it is somewhat difficult to tell the difference between the baby soap and the grapefruit bar.  I actually took a kitchen knife and carved a "B" in the baby soap so not to mix them up at a later time.

Despite this petty concern, the product is great and very well priced.  Thanks to the great people at Anima Soap, I am happy to giveaway FIVE BABY SOAPS AND FIVE GRAPEFRUIT BARS to one of you (see photo above)!  Here is how to win:

• Tweet the following: "Enter to win handmade organic soap from @Animasoap by visiting @AJDplusThree at: http://tinyurl.com/23bssau"  (one comment)
• Oh, and if you think I am super cool you can vote for me on Top Mommy Blogs (yes, I can tell if you voted) (one comment)

That's it folks!  You can tweet/vote daily for extra chances to win.  Remember to leave me your email address or contact me with a way to find you should you be the lucky winner.

You have until Friday at 11:59 p.m. CST to enter and I will pick a winner sometime on Saturday.  Good luck :)

Just don't stop, right?

I did it again.  I failed to look at what my running regimen would require yesterday and therefore found myself unexpectedly running 8 minutes at a time.  I mean, I really did not expect it, as I have become accustomed to repeating the same run/walk pattern for an entire week and THEN switching. I was thus expecting to walk three minutes and run for five (over and over).  Well, week 5 apparently doesn't follow the rules, hence the 8 minute surprise.  But, I suppose not knowing is good for me because I actually completed the 8 minutes jogging/5 minutes walking required for today!  Sans stroller, of course.  I think not knowing prevents me from creating a mental block with the "I can't do that" mentality. 

So after doing so well today you think I would have learned my lesson and NOT look ahead at my regimen.  I am dumb and looked.  TWENTY MINUTES!  That damn Couch to 5K Program wants me to run for 20 minutes without stopping.  How do you jump from 8 all the way to 20?  I am seriously scared because I don't know that I have ever jogged for that long my entire life and now on Tuesday I am just supposed to put on my pretty jogging shoes, my three sports bras and go? 

I know deep down that at some point I am going to have to bite the bullet and just go for it.  I just don't know how.  So what do you do when you get to that point in your workout when you think you want to stop?  What thoughts get you to the next level?  I really need any advice you can give because on Tuesday I want to go out and kick some 20 minute ass...not come home disappointed in myself.

I, of course, will give you an update...with your advice and some seriously crossed fingers I hope it will be a good update.

Sunday Funnies: Cat vs. Printer

So, my husband uncovered this youtube video a while back and I think it is hilarious.  The first few seconds are a little slow, but trust me, it is worth  a watch!



Hope you are all having a great weekend!

Running the distance...sort of.

I thought it was about time to give you all an update on my 5K training; after all, this is the place where I remain accountable.  I went out running on Wednesday after my stellar performance on Monday and thought I would just snap back into my regimen and do great.  Well, not so much.  Even though I got just as tired as I did just two days before, for some reason I just wasn't having it and I stopped midway through my regimen and walked the remainder of the course.  Boo.  Just boo.

Well, Friday I knew it was time to go out again (I run every other day) and I just didn't want to go.  The weather was assisting my bad attitude, as it was storming on and off.  But I did one thing that helped me actually get to it...I did not take a shower.  I mean, I really needed a shower.  My hair was greasy, I am sure I smelled funky, it was humid so I was a little sticky.  You get the point, I was a walking mass of grossness.  Sounds funny, I know, but I do this because when I am going to run taking a shower only to shower again seems wasteful...so I just wait it out. 

Anyway, my husband was home, Nikolai was in bed, Noelle was entertained and the weather had let up.  To validate my gross self walking out in public all day long, I had to run.  I got dressed, got my music going, hit "start" on my Couch to 5K iPhone App and was off.  I did my warm up and then started to run...and run...and run - until I realized I had been running for a while and still had plenty of time left to run.  I had inadvertently advanced myself to week 5 of 9 when I was really still on the last day of week 4 of 9 (remember, I stopped so I should have repeated the entire week 4 day three run).  Not wanting to start over I decided to just stick it out.  I did it.  Jogged 5 minutes on 3 minutes off for 31 minutes.  Yay me!

I will say there were several things that helped me out.  First, I wanted to succeed today...I hate failing twice in a row apparently.  Second, I did not have Nik with me which is really a two part thing.  No Nikolai to stop my flow because he needs something or is wailing in discontent.  Also, you never realize it until you run without pushing a stroller...but that crap is some resistance training in disguise!  It was so much easier to run sans stroller and 17 pound child. 

Well, I am hoping to keep my momentum going.  I really appreciate your comments, emails, FB messages and overall support.  Every word helps and keeps me going.  Thanks :)